After being gone on vacation for a week and a half, and trying to get my house back in order, it was time to get back in to real life. So, I started in on the many doctor and dentist appointments that we have spanning the next week and half... in total, there are 7 appointments... 2 for my cancer.
I went to the endo today. I had another list of questions for her. She really is awesome. She patiently listened to my questions and after answering questions about medications and timing of radioactive iodine, I asked her about possibly writing a letter stating that I have cancer, to help me with something that I needed, she told me that she would get me anything I needed, EVER. I got teary-eyed. She got up and hugged me. She really cares about her patients - I can tell. I like not feeling like a number. I told her that I am more emotional than usual about it this week than usual because I have been thinking about our trip to Disney in the fall. I told her that because I don't ever feel worried about the cancer itself, I didn't think it would affect my kids that much, but that they have been showing signs of trying to cope with their worry in different ways. I am trying to not have this affect their lives, trying to go on vacations as planned, etc. But this week, I have realized that although the cancer and surgery aren't that big of deal, the after-affects are an unknown and will be the hardest for me to deal with, physically. That I am worried about our Disney trip more than I care to admit. Also, we are spending money on surgery that is supposed to be for fun while in Florida... I told her that it was all overwhelming to think about and made me more emotional than I had been. She told me that it was okay to feel overwhelmed. She told me that it was okay to be frustrated by the situation and to have emotions about it. She said that cancer is disruptive. It's scary. I felt relieved to hear a doctor tell me that... and not just say that this was a "good cancer" or the kind of cancer that they would choose. I still feel guilty sometimes that it easier to deal with than what other people have to deal with. But, I still have cancer, the same as the next cancer patient. Whether I can joke about it in the moment or cry about it, doesn't matter, it's okay for me to say, "I have cancer."
She reviewed her notes and said that she never received a final pathology report from the radiologist for my lymph node biopsy. She would request that ASAP. She then said that saw that I had met with the surgeon and told me that if she were to choose a surgeon, she would go to one I am going to, or someone else on her team. I told her I was very impressed and liked the surgeon a lot. That I felt she was thorough and had a great bedside manner. We then discussed my pre-op labs and why the surgeon requested what she did. Dr. V was very helpful and patient wanted to make sure I understood. She was great... it also made me realize just how thorough my surgeon really is! On my way out the door, she walked me out to ask the receptionist to contact the radiologist for the final pathology report. The receptionist realized what I was there for, and after taking a note of what to ask for, said to me, "You are in good hands with Dr. V... she will take care of you." She then offered to write down a reminder card for next visit, even though I assured her I had it in my phone. She wrote down her name on the card and walked around the desk to hand it to me. She said, "If you ever need anything, you call this number (pointing to the card) and ask for me, Marge, they will transfer you to me. We will take very good care of you." She then hugged me and handed me the card! I seriously love these people. What a warm and caring office!
It did make me wonder if I were to tell everyone that I have cancer, if I would get hugs other places, too... the grocery store? I don't go that many places... just doc appts. and grocery shopping, so that would be about it. Hmmm... maybe, if I was a more outgoing person, I would try it, just to see. :)
I have 2 friends that found out that I had this appointment and another one (not related to my cancer) today, that would take the majority of my day, today. They are teaming up to bring my family dinner. I am very grateful for the support that I have from friends, they are amazing!!
No comments:
Post a Comment