After asking about the weight loss, I told him it wasn't great, but that I had a lump I wanted to discuss with him and that it was on my neck. He looked up at me, no hesitation, "I will send you in to get a soft tissue ultrasound of your neck to get it checked out, it's probably just a benign cyst from your thyroid, they are very common, but we should make sure." Later during the exam, he felt the lump and admitted it was a little high to be my thyroid but all the more reason to get it scanned and checked out.
"When was your last mammogram?" My answer of 12 years ago was not satisfactory to him, but in fairness, I just barely turned 40 and they haven't been recommended until now. So I walked out of his office with an order for a mammogram and a soft tissue neck ultrasound. I researched my options of locations and that afternoon called to make the appointment. I thought it would take weeks to schedule both together. I said, "I have 2 procedures I need, I'd like to do both. One is a mammogram, I think it will be harder to schedule." The lady asked what the other was and I told her, her reply was, "Oh, do you you have a history of thyroid cancer?" I was caught off guard. I didn't say was getting my thyroid scanned. I was getting my neck scanned. Yes, I knew why we were getting this bump checked out, what it was we were checking for, but to hear someone say the word "cancer" threw me, just a bit. I told her that I had lump we were getting checked out and that was it.
On Thursday, April 27, I went in and had both scans done. I had my mammogram first. The technician didn't say anything about what she saw, just that it would take 4-5 days to get the report to the doctor. Then I had the ultrasound done. I didn't expect to get any information from the tech. I walked into the room and she had a question for me... "Are you expecting to have an ultrasound done of your neck tissue or your thyroid?" I smiled. I knew that the scheduler had made note of the thyroid but that my original order from the doc only said neck. I explained that I had a lump, we wanted to check it out, but that the scheduler assumed I needed my thyroid done, too. The tech said, "well, let's take a look at your lump... and then I will scan your thyroid." She didn't NEED to scan the thyroid (or my lymph nodes, which I found out later that she did), but she felt like she should. She started the scan and within a few minutes said, "that bump is just a lymph node, they can stay swollen for up to 2 weeks fighting infections." We were going on 5 weeks, but she didn't sound worried, so I wasn't worried. She then scanned my thyroid. She measured and took pictures of every aspect of thyroid. I knew there was something interesting there... It took forever! She got finished and said, "OK, so you have what we call a nodular thyroid. It is common. We will get the report typed up and sent to your doctor tomorrow or Monday at the latest. I knew this meant 1 of 2 things... Either the ultrasound tech had less patients than the mammogram tech and can promise reports faster OR there was something wrong and my doctor needed to know ASAP. Of course I went home and Googled "thyroid nodules." Phew! Estimated that over 50% of the population can develop them in their lifetime and that 90-95% of them are benign. My odds of this being common and probably nothing are very good!
The next week, I contacted the doctor's office to check for results. He would have to call me back later, which he did. Blood work from week ago was fine, mammogram was fine, ultrasound showed nodules that the radiologist recommended we get biopsied. Oh. Hmm... Okay...
I immediately wondered what they saw. How routine is it to get a biopsy done on these? My doc called me at the worst possible time of day. I couldn't ask questions, and he was leaving the next day to go out of town. So, we made arrangements for me to get the biopsy order and I got off the phone. Back to the chaos I was in the middle of at home - packing up dinner for another family, getting my son ready for taekwondo, arranging the pick up of my other son from the tutor so he could go to soccer practice. My head was spinning, but no time to process any of this.
The next day, I called to schedule the biopsy but they couldn't do that scheduling then, it was a specialized procedure, so they would need to call me back within 24 hours. I waited nearly 24 hours, feeling like I didn't dare leave the house, even to go get the mail or I would miss the call. I felt as if I was being held hostage by this elusive phone call. So, with nothing else to do, I made cookies, lots of cookies. I finally called them back at hour 23 and they pushed my call through to the scheduler, apologizing for not calling me back. I set my appointment for the next Wednesday, May 3.
The next few days I went through various emotions. Feeling like this is no big deal because, thyroid cancer is the easiest to treat, has a high success rate, to being totally terrified at the possibility of being told that I have cancer, any form of cancer, treatable or not.
At the biopsy, I had my first ever vasovagal response, at least that I am aware of and that I knew what it was. It felt familiar, though, so it's possible that I have had it before, I think during my C-sections, but because of that situation, it was harder to recognize. I told them how I felt (cold sweats and nauseous) and they took care of me, telling me it was normal. I laughed a little and told them I knew what it was because my daughter does that, but it was the first time for me. Once I had stabilized we continued with the procedure. After the biopsy, I asked for a copy of my original scan, because I had never seen it. They were very accommodating. My neck looked like I had been bit by a snake, twice. Over the next few days, as my neck began to show increased bruising, I began to Google the terms on my original report. I now see why I needed a biopsy. But that is a post for another day. For now... I was googling, waiting, and bruised. I said to my son, "it looks like I got bit by a..." And before I could say snake, he said, "vampire." Yes, that, too. I had vampire bites. I should have taken a picture.
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